Thursday, May 08, 2014


I've been dieting. For about a month now.

I don't get on scales when I diet, because I lose weight ridiculously slowly. My thyroid has always been a problem. I have "Hashimoto's Thyroiditis," which is an autoimmune disease where your immune system believes your thyroid to be a tumor and gets busy destroying it and your metabolism as well.

In my thirties, to lose weight I would have to exercise daily and consume no more than 900 calories. At 1200 to 1500 calories I maintain my weight. Above that and I will gain two pounds a week.

Until now.

I have been dieting. For about a month now. To lose the layer of fat around my middle that is an unhealthy threat to my heart, not to mention remarkably unattractive.

This motivation has been spurred by my sweetie having to lose weight to avoid a pre-diabetic diagnosis. I challenged him to a race, touting how I would "leave him in the dust!" Because I am wicked competitive. It's worked. He's shrinking like plastic wrap in the oven. Thank goodness.

I have been dieting. Here's what I eat:  Oatmeal in the morning: small bowl with nuts and blueberries, a little splash of agave and nonfat milk. Snack at 10: a tiny single serving of hummus or applesauce. Lunch is protein: hamburger patty or three meatballs or a can of tuna. Snack afternoon: hardboiled egg or see Snack at 10. Dinner: Can of soup not over 200 calories, or veggies or a salad. For over a month now.

In the past few weeks I've experienced some kind of shoulder injury. I went to the doc today for a physical to generally check out my health and see about my shoulder. Turns out I've got an injury to my rotator cuff and will have to keep it still awhile. Good to know. Then the exciting part.

I was also so looking forward to getting on my old nemesis - the scale - and rock the slidy bitch down a few notches.

I've gained 3 pounds.

Did I mention I've been dieting?

Not me:

P.S. Blood tests have been ordered. The doctor is as mystified as I am, though he suspects my thyroid has moved further south. Duh. Meanwhile, I could eat my arm.